Living in our society we have certain expectations, the main one being that we want everything the second we decide it's something we have ever wanted. At the moment I am once again facing the fact that it's not our time line that things happen on. When you pray for something you have to learn that sometimes it's something you don't need or that there are lessons you have to learn first, this being said I wish I would learn whatever lesson it is that I need to so we could get life going again!
The hubbs has been unemployed for all of two months, before this two months when he played the stock market just for fun things went well. Now that life could use that however things aren't going so great. We signed up for the GI Bill almost 12 weeks ago (it's supposed to kick in between 4 and 6) still nothing, I know I shouldn't be shocked since it is the military but it's frustrating when all the things you counted on aren't panning out. Job hunting is going as badly as we had been warned (worse than we had hoped) we have decided that within the next month if things haven't begun to pan out he will take any job he can get for the time being. Some how through all this we are both still happy and hopeful, we both of course have our moments mine being a lot more numerous than his. Even with nothing working out it's amazing the feeling I have that tells me that we are exactly where we should be. I have never been a better mother, a lot of which has to do with finally allowing our family to be a marriage based family (parental relationship comes first) having this time with Hubs gives me a break and does something I can't quite explain to my desire to be a good mother. I spend more time cuddling and loving the boys, reading to them for hours on end, and teaching them anything they have interest in. I may be failing severely in other areas (like accomplishing sewing projects) but this balance is winning out. Hopefully I pick up it is whatever I am supposed to learn soon (I know it's got to be me I am the stubborn one) and we get on with life, but for now I am just going to enjoy the days where we get to be together all day through every scraped knee and especially for every flooded toilet. (thank you my 3 yr old darling)